I think I officially had a breakdown. I also think during it Patrick has never looked so nervous in his life.
Here’s the situation: I am told constantly by relatives that their wedding day was one or all of the following:
1. Planned in a shorter amount of time
Great. Congratulations. You had a wedding before the internet and before the economy crash and the wedding industry blew up into the current redonkulous it is now. I’m happy for you. I’m unsure how your feedback is helping me.
The average wedding currently costs about $30K, but that is the national average so basically you don’t even want to know what the average is in the state of New Jersey (did I mention the average cost of a catering hall is around $150/person). This is problemo uno. Also, I have the internet and Pinterest and wedding vendors who do everything possible to make sure they’re better than the competition that literally lives next door. Thanks to technology, literally everyone is a DJ and invitation vendor and a photographer…the list goes on.
Let’s begin at the bridal breakdown. Being an engaged bride for 18 months, my process has of course had more time than others. In the beginning I was so confused on why brides went CRAZY. Now I know.
There are so many vendors out there, at different pricing and different services, you can literally spend your entire year of planning just picking out a caterer or a DJ. Once you do pick them out, they have a million questions and options for you. Oh you want a DJ? Here’s an online dashboard to add all the songs you want manually one by one. Oh and we need a timeline of events down to the minute and who’s going to be there and who’s involved and what color lighting do you want and where should they set up and where are the outlets….
Let’s move to catering. Pick a menu, pick where the tables are, don’t forget that timeline, what color are the napkins, do they go with the flowers, which liquor brands do you want, do you want a signature drink, what kind of water should we put out….
These are the questions and requests both Patrick and I have been managing since day 1 for up to 12 different vendors, except the major change that has happened in the past few months is that vendors email me directly or look at me when they ask a question, suddenly making this completely my job. That also moves past our vendors because most of the wedding questions from family, friends, our bridal party, etc. are also directed right at me.
My stress level has been building up from this and started to skyrocket when I would cross things off my list and have someone immediately say, “hey did you do [insert task] yet? OMG you didn’t [insert task] yet ARE YOU CRAZY you better do [insert task]!!!”
:: sigh ::
So Wednesday I had a breakdown. Over a few issues no longer worth discussing. But in case you need a mental image of what happened, here you go:
In conclusion, be nice to your engaged friends. They’re very fragile. And broke.